First, this is a great topic!
I have really mixed feelings about this subject. I started out playing a banjo several years back with absolutely NO CLUE how to make music. Learning in the online environment only I relied solely on tab to learn tunes. I knew maybe one or two old-time banjo tunes and that's it. Everything else I had never even heard before basically. So tab's helped me learn. I became a whiz at reading tab and could get a brand new tune memorized in no time flat. So I learned to completely copy and basically "puke-up" tab. This helped me to actually hit strings and make notes come out in some semblance of order. So in that way it helped me. I have nothing against tab and still use it as a helpful tool in learning tunes, but I do not rely on it at all.
So on the other hand I think me relying solely on tab also hindered my progress. After about 2 years of just TAB-puking (LOL), I started to see people online (youtube and elsewhere) who were taking a different approach. Right at about the same time I really started wanting to try and sing while playing. So these people were playing the chords to the song while singing (using very few of the actual melody notes of the song) and then they'd take breaks where they'd play the melody notes. I found this arrangement really pleasing and knew that this was the way for me to go if I wanted to sing along with playing. So I put tab to the side and would think of a song I wanted to do and I'd look up the guitar chords for that song. Then I'd start a basic bum-ditty (on banjo) using those chords and sing along. I'd also pick out (by ear) a simple break (solo, whatever it's called) of the melody notes of the song. Adding all that in together and transitioning from playing bum-ditty to just the melody notes and singing is all very challenging and TOTALLY FUN to me. So now I feel like in the past 6 months or so my musical journey has really advanced light years ahead of where I would be if I was still relying on tab.
So if I had it all to do over again I think I would start without tab at all basically. I can't hardly believe I'm saying that but in my personal experience I feel that the tab held me back and that I would have a better understanding of music theory if I would have started using that second approach I mentioned.
The wonderful thing IMO is that it is YOUR OWN JOURNEY. You get to choose how to go about it all. You can rely on tab just a bit, a bunch, or not at all. You can take many different approaches and all of them are correct IMO. The problem I would see is if someone after a couple years of playing did not want to advance beyond tab. I understand SOOOOO much more now that I can relatively easily pick out tunes once I hear them enough to know them. The freedom playing by ear gives is unimaginable IMO. I really wish I would have started that way, BUT and here's a big BUTT (LOL).
If I would have started without tab I may have gotten quickly discouraged and QUIT playing. So I really do feel like tab has a place, I just personally hope that people try later on to get beyond tab. The music world has just exploded for me once I started stepping out beyond tab and I would want that to happen for everyone.
Now I'm sure that there will be folks who think I'm wrong (and it would not be the first or last time on that) but my main point is that it's your own personal journey and NO ONE should have that much power over you to influence you and how you want to learn something. I spent several years on another site that shall remain nameless being stifled and told that most of what I was doing was wrong. Well BLAH is what I say to all that, there are no rules IMO. I was told I would hurt myself because of bad form playing banjo and that just makes me chuckle right now. That was just one of many things I was told.
Some great ideas have already been expressed here and it really is interesting to learn how other folks have gotten to where they are today. Like many wise folks have said in the past - there's more than one way to skin a cat.