I haven't joined any jams for some of the reasons that have been shared here. Plus, I don't know of any local dulcimer groups. If there are any, they have a secret password or something. A couple places in my area have Irish sessions and there's an old time group, but I need to just go listen and see what I think. My husband took up banjo (but put it down about a year ago due to schedule overload) and I've thought it would be fun to try to play together. He hasn't had the same enthusiasm. Playing a musical instrument is something he never, ever did until he took it up about five years ago, so he just doesn't feel comfortable with the notion.

I'm sorry to hear Thanna ran into that kind of attitude. When I had my short lived time with the gospel group at church, they were sort of that way, too. In fact, though I was "the answer to a prayer," somehow I wasn't informed of the practice schedule after our break. I actually confronted the group leader on that, telling her I was okay with that, but had I been a new member of the congregation, that would have been very uncool. She apologized but I think she had her own agenda the whole time. People are funny, aren't they?

I agree with Strumelia on this, Thanna. Don't be discouraged.

Having even just one other player who enjoys the same tunes you do is very nice. Before I left the group, one of the other members had mentioned to me that she too wasn't happy with the speed every tune was being handle at, and she wasn't enjoying the music the way she had hoped to when she bought her dulcimer. She to had come to the instrument from hearing the drones.

So once a week we started meeting at my place, and enjoyed an afternoon of music together. We shared an interest in pretty much the same type of music, and a simple melody/drone playing style. I miss our getting together since she moved away.

Keep looking, and I hope you find another group to share your dulcimer with.

Strumelia said:

Thanna, don't be discouraged. It looks like you perhaps just don't fit in with that group.

All it takes is to find ONE other player who likes the same kinds of tunes you do and is open to both of you exploring and learning while playing and having fun together. Could be another dulcimer player, a fiddler, a banjo player, guitar, mandolin, whatever. Just someone who wants to work together at a beginner level on some tunes in common, without being judgemental. Maybe your teacher can help further now in this new situation.

As for the club....you already have a dulcimer teacher, one who apparently has some confidence in your abilities. Don't give up how you like to play. Perhaps that club should clarify their purpose and goals.

--
Site Owner

Those irritated by grain of sand best avoid beach.
-Strumelia proverb c.1990

I knew it would reslove itself - There is Mr Lackey , who found what he was looking for and uses the words NEXT TIME and GREAT TIME in the same sentence. That is what its about.........FUN.

Then again, I was asked if I wanted to join a jam recently, and did so reluctantly because I did not know the tunes they were playing and I was carrying a new (to me) dulcimer with which I wasn't fully comfortable. However, insistence of the people prevailed over my common sense and I joined in anyway. I chorded along using my thumb and fingers not a pick, didn't try to take the lead and played a little "fill" type harmony. I was asked several times to lead a tune, but I begged off. NEXT time, hopefully, I'll have an instrument I've played more and which feels comfortable and I can more fully participate since I had a GREAT time just being with those folks!

Keep looking Thanna and you'll find a place to fit!

Randy - thats using the word club in a different sense (tongue in cheek)

Well Thanna keep on a playing and things always work out for the best. The dulcimer club you visited...more than likely they're not just a bunch of crack smokers...: )....they've got a little club and they know what sound they like and if someone wants to play with them they have their parameters & make them known....& nothing wrong with that right?

Ken - You know what I meant, didn't you ?. I just am shocked that 3 enthusiasts who bit the bullet and went to a jam or session and ran into a brick wall instead of being welcomed thro the door - hopefully as we would welome newcomers. Thanfully they are probably the only 3 sessions (jams) like that. And I also agree with Foggers and the bullet points she makes.( Only 'cos I met her & her partner is bigger than me ), treat the newbie like you would want to be treat in the same situation.

I fall into the DADist and Chordist camp tho. I know no better (Bad education -- beer mats )

Hi - good topic choice Lisa!

Thanna - I would add my support to that offered by others. If there are no other specific dulcimer sessions in your area then look for an old timey, folk or acoustic session. You may have to try a few places until you land on one that is flexible and welcoming. I have certainly had my share of trials since I decided to get back into some public music via sessions about 3 years ago. It is worth persevering to find sympathetic others to play with as it will speed your learning immensely; I know that jamming and playing in public (alone and with others) has been a real shot in the arm for me. But first, a cautionary tale....

When we moved house a couple of years ago we were thrilled to find that a pub just half a mile away had a regular folk music session every week. However, having tried it a few times, it is not one we attend regularly, and I will tell you why.... The core members of the group have known each other a long time and know all each others' material, so they all launch in to everything without really listening. This can be a REAL problem. For example, once I was up to speed on a few american folk songs, we did "Shady Grove". Within 30 seconds of playing and singing, one of the regulars shouted "Oo its just like 'Matty Groves!' " and they all waded in on guitars, mandolin and melodeon. Well actually, the melody we use is NOT exactly the same as 'Matty Groves' and the harmonies we use ( we sing together with banjo ) are not the same as the famous version of Matty Groves these chaps all knew. The result was that we could not hear each other, and the discordant clash between what we were playing and what they were wading in with was HORRID!!

So to add to Strumelia's list of guidelines for welcoming newbies to a jam :

• Ask your new comer(s) if they would like to play
• LISTEN to what your newcomer starts up with and ONLY play along if youare sure you know the version more or less exactly, or you are such an accomplished musician that you can pick it up quickly
• Allow the newcomer to lead on their piece, including the tempo - follow politely
• Do not drown out the newcomer when they are playing; it is too off-putting
  
  

Happily, we know other great places to go now for playing and singing; so I guess the moral of my tale is that you may have to kiss a few frogs before you find the perfect match.....

Thanna said "I'm probably too new for most people to wantto play with LOL!"

You are welcome to play around here any old time! Frankly I enjoy watching the Light come on as new players "get it" and

New-ness is never an excuse for that kind of behavior. We're supposed to be about helping new people find, enjoy and come to love our non-mainstream instrument, not dictating that you will play in a specific manner. Thank Murphy there is no such thing as the formalized Suzuki Method for dulcimer! If there was, I'd take up something really obscure like left-handed cimbalom or fretless ukulele!

David - I hope you realize that the vast majority of dulcimer players over here are not like those described above. Every barrel has its bad apples (to twist a few metaphors). However it is also true that the overweening attitude here is that DAd is the tuning and that there should be no sticks in the left hands of dulcimer players.

As a noter & drone player for over 35 years I've experienced my share of of Dadism and Chordism. Is it any wonder that I sometimes sign myself

Uncontrite Modal Folker

I do not believe what I have just read. Thanna , Folkfan and R N Lackey have just shot down in flames the idea that dulcimer players are friendly, even- handed and open to new things . It seems that the 3 of them have run into a group of dyed -in -the wool diehard reactionaries. I understand that the States is the home of Trad Appilacian dulcimers . Talk about " how to win friends " Two choices then , 1 . face them out and stick with it until you win them over or 2 as has been said find a new group or start one yourself. In my neck of the woods( N E England ) we (dulcimer players ) are so few and far between that we are only too pleased to see each other. I put my hands up and confess ,I have never played noter,nor tried any other tuning other than DaD. Now I have more than one dulcimer, I may in future experiment,but I doubt it . Its taken too many years and too many blistered fingers to get this far. DO NOT GIVE UP.

I am more than 3,000 miles away and I feel quite angry about this,(not an easy thing to do) Thank Heaven that it (so far) hasn't happened to me.If it has, I never noticed (Thick skin ,or too much Guinness )

Well Thanna,

As a noter drone player, you need to find yourself a good old time banjo player to jam with. Banjo and noter drone go together like ham and eggs Much better than trying to fit in where your playing style is not appreciated.

Thanna said:

Sorry to hear about your problem with the local dulcidiots club.

Maybe you should print all this out and go back again to thank everyone for your previous visit and hand them a copy of this !

Where do you live; maybe we can find you a couple of sympathetic unbigoted, unprejudiced folks to play with...

Took me a while longer to give up on group playing. Having gone through the DAd can't play with DAA lecture from a member of the group I used to go to, I hear you. Of course, my response to the individual was to inform her of certain facts, i.e. that I was playing the same blasted notes in DAA that she was in DAd. That's when I got the chords sound better routine. ARGH!!!!!!!!

Speed of play was also a problem for me. When ever the music got too fast, "Why does it always become a race?", I'd turn my dulcimer over and drum. Usually the group stopped playing when at least half of the players were drumming, so I wasn't alone in not caring for the speed. Songs like "Simple Gifts" shouldn't be hurried, but played to a singing speed not a gallop.

So, now, as stay at home player, I enjoy the music I prefer. The only way I'd join a jam is with a shaker egg.

Thanna said:

It's a shame some groups are so hide-bound! I was talking to some in a group (after they had played) and they also didn't know any other tuning other than DAD. When I showed them my dulcimer was tuned to DGD, they acted like it was something strange and unusual or maybe from Mars. Only one person was brave enough to try it, and they used mine instead of re-tuning theirs.

Hopefully you'll find some other more welcoming

That stinks, and I am so sorry that you had to endure that for as long as you did.

Intitial advice to a newbie to a session --- Look, Listen, & Learn. Good advice can be found on the web - Google music session etiquette. By and large, session players are keen to help and encourage new players and beginners. Thats what can sometimes keep sessions going in the future. It's sometimes forgotten that each and every one of us started somewhere, we all made mistakes , fell off tunes ( sometimes still do), played too fast, played too slow , put the second part of a different tune to the one we started. At the end of the day, it's supposed to be FUN. I look upon sessions as a way of holding a non verbal conversation with the others. Never forget there will always be one (occasionally) who will pull a face,but an awful lot won't. Again LOOK, LISTEN & LEARN . Recently read quote (Can't remember the scource) "Better to play slow with feeling and get all the notes than play fast ,have no feeling and miss most of the notes"

Yes, I have seen that happen a few times- where a new jammer starts their own tune at a slow pace which is the only way they can play it, and some hotshot starts speeding it up until the beginner simply has to drop out. How rude is that?!

So yes one thing is to ask the newcomer if they have a tune they'd like to play, and to make a point of saying they should play it at their own comfortable pace.

It's always nice to ask the newcomer if they have any favorite tunes they'd like to play.

--
Site Owner

Those irritated by grain of sand best avoid beach.
-Strumelia proverb c.1990

We often hear about jam etiquette in terms of what we should do if we are trying to join and fit in with a jam, but what about looking at it from the other side?

I thought I'd toss this out there for folks to share their own ideas...

When you're playing in a jam or session, and a new hesitant person approaches, what things do you do to make them feel comfortable and welcome?

What if they are a beginner player and are having a little trouble keeping up with everyone else- what things might you do to help them out in some way?

On the flip side- what kinds of things would tend to discourage a new person and make their initial jamming experiences unsuccessful?

--
Site Owner

Those irritated by grain of sand best avoid beach.
-Strumelia proverb c.1990
updated by @strumelia: 08/01/23 06:28:46PM